Mood:  sad
Now Playing: I'm never going to say goodbye, by Billy Preston
Dear Pat, Your song is playing and I will always think of you when it comes on. It gives me comfort and I can hear you saying the words to me. This is another hard day for me, Please come to me tonight and tell me it's gonna be okay. I checked mine and Davids horoscope and it says today is going to be a start of new things, for both of us. Yuk, I loved him so much. How could he do this to me? How could I mean nothing to him? I am so tired of all the men in my life cheating on me, lying to me, or just telling me they can't commit. I feel horrible, I feel like crumbling. Part of me can feel me split, divide and forget it ever existed. The other part of me is afraid to start crying cause I won't be able to stop. Krissy got a tattoo today and I know she feels bad about it. It breaks my heart for her too, cause I know she can't help her self and she does these stupid things, maybe just to fit in. I am helping Kelly move back in with ryan and she has so much to do, adncan't do it. I just feel horrible. I feel just awful. I really loved him, so very very much, I thought he was my soul mate, I never thought he would hurt me like this. Oh damn, now your other song is coming on... stop your crying it will be allright, just take my hand hold it tight, I will protect you from all around you, I will be here, don't you cry. this bond between us can't be broken, I will be here, don't you cry, cause you'll be in my heart, yes you'll be in my heart. Please Pat help me....... from heaven, come and help me.I know it's gonna be okay if you are around, but I am just so hurt. I am too logical, I can't forgive him this time, first I find out about Lyn, which I still sort of believe him, but nobody else sure does, and now to find out about the ads. TOo much, and it makes sense with him not wanting to marry me or buy me a ring. Oh how sad. I loved him so much. well, like he says, "i'll get laid again". Great.........I mean nothing, cause if I did, he wouldn't have done it, or he's just the kind of person that thinks it's acceptable like Kevin did. I guess maybe I am the only person in the world who thinks cheating isn't a problem. I sure know that I can't ever imagine I will ever find my soul mate again. I wish God would help me tonight. Good night Pat, please come tonight, and let me know it's gonna be okay.